I Hate Mush

I hate mush and I am not fan of writing about my mush (now is probably the time to clarify that by mush I actually mean love, gooeyness, cheese laden ode's!!!!!)....BUT....... given that the aforementioned appears to have taken over my world today, it is a little hard to ignore....and if I have to put up with this weapon of mass destruction, then so does everybody else!!!!!

Given that it is almost Valentines Day....my heart is busting. I don't usually go in for February 14th, but this year I am totally in love/broken hearted and this is simply stoking my blaze which I have been totally trying to beat down since new year.....(out with the old.......)........

.....so this is really not helpful....but its here, its happening like a relapse.........it is almost unbearable.....and I just have to ride this one out.

Today....the love was there, so much so it made my day fucking miserable....because absolutely nothing else compared to my life when my dream lover was here. It didn't help that my day at work was grey and overcast, boredom kicking in by 11am......coffee and red bull not making any difference to my experience.....
everyone pissed me off and not once did I feel bad about the daydreams I was having where I was telling them all to fuck off and leave me alone..........

When all you need is space, why does it seem like the time when everyone else wants a piece of you?????.....Persistent was extraordinary today.....wanting to entertain me with her ever so delightful high pitched voice, whilst she quizzed me about my weekend like a discerning mother would. Seriously, my mother wouldn't dream of asking me half the things Persistent throws at me.

This evening, I'm listening to sad 'good bye' songs (Katie Melua (??????) ...Piece by Piece....just one example....I'm even more embarrassed to share the rest...) and thinking why the fuck I have wasted my time loving someone who can never love me back.........tttshhh.........

Now its almost bedtime and I am back in love again..........and I just want to enjoy the moment as I drift off to sleep..............Mush!